If you are taking the time to read this, chances are you’re one of the millions of Americans who feel trapped in a marriage that just isn’t working. If you’re looking for advice about traditional marriage counseling, I’d suggest you skip this and catch the afternoon talk shows; after watching three or four fighting couples verbally eviscerate each other as they attempt to talk through their issues, you’ll have a better understanding of why marriage counseling so frequently fails to <a rel=”nofollow” onclick=”javascript:pageTracker._trackPageview(‘/outgoing/article_exit_link’);” href=”http://www.marriagemax.com”>Save Marriage</a> and may actually make things worse. Throw in a therapist who’s focused on dissecting and addressing every little thing that’s gone wrong in the past and you can add what’s referred to as “analysis paralysis†into the mix. Following this path, I can pretty much guarantee that the future for you and your spouse includes months of heart-wrenching therapy sessions, counseling bills that are through the roof and a decent chance that your relationship will fall apart despite your efforts.
An alternative approach that I would suggest looking into is a program known as “marriage fitness.†Instead of a damaging fixation on past transgressions with a need to talk through all of these hurtful experiences (or learning to “communicate†as a therapist would say), the focus is on learning to connect with your spouse once again, to regain the relationship that drew you to marriage in the first place. One of the interesting advantages here is that this method can actually improve a relationship even if only one of the spouses is actively participating- so you can do something about a failing marriage without having to drag a reluctant partner into an office. In my experience, this alternative to traditional counseling has proved effective in relationships suffering from any of the classic symptoms of damage, including: infidelity, addictive behaviors, emotional abuse and separation.
Working exclusively with couples trapped in dysfunctional relationships, Gerard Schmidt is a therapist who will make an effort to save your marriage wherever possible. While not a supporter of some traditional methods such as marriage counseling and the Marriage Retreat, Schmidt has had considerable success employing alternative techniques. He holds information sessions on a regular basis, so if your relationship is suffering and Saving Your Marriage has become a priority, watch your local paper for possible seminar dates.
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